Reach for the stars

Okay sooo .... I have a new lj.

it's herionbobkcuf  I am aware that heroin is spelled wrong. and for all you smarties, 'kcuf' is fuck. backwards.

Im totally cool.

ADD MEEEE. k thanks.

I'm totally rockin' a pokemon shirt. A new one. I bought it at value village yesterday. OH yeaaa..

It's so wet and slippery outside. The drive way is a like a rink.

hmm. I use to love skating. I use to love pokemon haha. ...

CSI NY is on. ...

This entry is dead. =/

I'm so. conflicted. The more I make my way towards boy-hood the more I think about what others will say, think, do. The more I think being a 'girl' would be easier, less complicated, less explanations, just less. Sometimes I just want to rewind. I want to take back all this boy shit. I want to learn how to 'love my cunt' and be satisfied. but it's too late. I feel like I've challenged myself and I can't back out now. There's just that feeling of being stuck. Does this make me less of a boy? I worry about being to femme. I worry what others think.

Could I back out and have all my friends change their view of me? 'Hey guys, I tricked you, I love my pussy and my girly voice.' Would that make me a poser? A fake transgender. 'Oh it was just a phase.' Is it? Does me thinking about it make it so? If I equip myself with both does that make me ... uncapadable.  Maybe it's just my human need to be accepted. I hate upsetting people and I hate it when my actions have consequences. 




Forever love, say you'll love me